On My Bookshelf: Why My Personal Library Matters to Me


I have had a conversation about this very topic three times in the past week or so. I'm writing it down purely for my own indulgence.

I'm really picky about buying books. I read all the time and I'm always looking for something new, but I always get my books from the library (unless I have a gift card, in which case I let myself go a little wild). In order for a book to make my personal bookshelf, it has to be worth it. I have to like it, and see something of value--some theme or character or notion that is particularly striking. It has to be more than worth the space it takes up. This means that even though I enjoy a lot of books, I generally don't buy them. Instead, I write them down in my reading journal along with notes, thoughts, quotes, and brief plot summary, so if I ever want to revisit it I can remember the details and find another copy. This means that I have a very healthy relationship with my local library.

Bookshelf space is precious and small when you only have a bedroom for everything you own (and a few boxes at your parents house) and therefore it saved for things I love and things that are impactful. I should also say that I am a re-reader. Many people never reread books, but I do. Not usually the entire book, rather specific passages that are enlightening or interesting or just make me smile. I revisit them weeks or months or years after my first exposure to the story and suddenly I'm thinking about it entirely differently than the first time. Sometimes that means it comes off the shelf and taken to Goodwill, no longer of use to me. Sometimes that means it has a more dear place in my collection.

Once it's passed the criteria to make the shelf, there's the matter of the book itself. I own lots of paperback books mostly because they're less expensive.  Also because I have a love/hate relationship with dust jackets. I like them on the shelf, but I always take them off when I'm reading a book. However, it is no secret that hardbacks always are more beautiful than the paperback version, and the paper is always better quality. Regardless, I don't have very many. This is okay with me. If it's on my shelf, it's probably going to be tattered and torn well-loved eventually anyway, and paperbacks weigh less in my purse. I'm a huge fan of deckled edges, and I hate when the type is unnecessarily large. I hate when there are people's faces on the cover, or when the author's name is bigger than the title. That being said, I still will usually pick the cheapest option. I have this dream that someday, I will buy based on the edition and design that I like. We'll see.

My bookshelf is not for aesthetics. I have a friend who's bookshelf is beautifully arranged, with books beautifully spaced and little knick-knacks artfully scattered throughout. Aesthetics determine her choices. This is not the case with mine. My books are alphabetized by author, regardless of subject matter or genre. Size and shape don't matter; they are almost never of uniform size or color. Also, library books go on the shelf, simply so I don't lose them.

And it serves me well. And that's the most important part. My library has to be personal. It has to be helpful to me and not a burden to be carried from apartment to apartment. It's a visible collection of happiness and education and little glimpses of an earlier version of myself.

Someday, I hope my library won't be relegated to a very small bookshelf. When I'm feeling far too optimistic, I imagine it will be like the library in Beauty in the Beast with a ladder and stretching high above my head.

But for now, I'm content to fill my shelf with care.

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